Are You Building a Life Around What Truly Matters? The 4 C’s That Lead to Lasting Fulfillment

Last week, we reflected on the pursuit of material success and how the endless chase for the "4 P's"—Power, Prestige, Possessions, and Pleasure—can leave us feeling unsatisfied. After owning a McLaren, I realized how fleeting external success markers are and how they can distract us from what truly brings joy and satisfaction. If you want to catch up on the backstory, you can read more HERE.

I received a lot of feedback, with some people questioning whether I was against owning possessions. I want to be clear: I am not against having nice things. However, it’s important to know why we want them and what purpose do they serve in our lives?

If we move beyond the pursuit of the 4 P's, what comes next? What can guide us toward living a fuller, more meaningful life?

This week, I want to explore the alternative: the 4 C's—Connections, Creativity, Charity, and Challenges. I believe these are the essential pillars of a life well-lived, a life that moves beyond status, power, and material accumulation, centering instead on greater purpose, meaning, and deeper connections.

Growing up, I was a fan of boating. My father was of Viking descent, and I can only presume this influenced his proclivity for captaining vessels. For as long as I can remember, my dad owned boats—not just one, but multiple boats for various modes of adventure and exploration.

Some of my fondest childhood memories involve being on boats with my family and friends. Whether it was learning to water ski, mastering slaloming, attempting tricks on a wakeboard, battling in epic tubing contests, embarking on multi-day ocean adventures, or simply spending an afternoon on a secluded beach—these reflections remain deeply cherished.

From these experiences, I learned that a boat, while a possession, can serve as an incredible conduit for creating meaningful and lasting memories. Wanting to pay this forward to my own family, I bought a Nautique surf boat. This purchase presented an opportunity to continue my personal journey toward a deeper understanding of what it means to live within the 4 C's.

At first glance, buying a boat might seem like just another indulgence in the 4 P's, but this purchase was different. The surf boat didn’t represent prestige or power. It became a tool that allowed me to deepen my relationships, unlock creative talent, and (unexpectedly) live a life filled with more meaning.

Connections: Valuing People Over Things

When we chase possessions as part of the 4 P's, we risk valuing things over people. But what if our possessions could become gateways to deeper connections with those who matter most?

Kelly and I have hosted countless afternoons on our Nautique with friends and family, sharing laughter, conversation, and creating memories that will last a lifetime. Unlike the McLaren, which fed my desire for attention and external validation, the boat facilitated real, face-to-face moments of joy. Every wakesurfing session or quiet cruise became an opportunity to invest in relationships that truly enrich my life.

One fundamental lesson I've learned is that true wealth isn’t measured by what you have, but by the depth of the relationships you cultivate. The boat wasn’t just a purchase; it was an investment in creating meaningful connections.

Creativity: Embracing New Experiences

Owning the Nautique also unlocked a new realm of creativity. In a world driven by performance metrics and achievements, it’s easy to forget that creativity plays a crucial role in our happiness. Creativity isn’t limited to music, art or traditional pursuits—it’s found in how we approach problem-solving and how we experience new things.

Water sports like wakesurfing have brought out a playful, adventurous side. This is most evident during our weekly surf club where a group of us gets together early in the morning to hang out and ride. A key part of the experience is progression—learning new tricks on the board, experimenting with different style boards and seeing if we can get multiple people on the wave.

Speaking of progression, my wife Kelly is an absolute star! Watching her on the wave is breathtaking and inspiring –especially when there is some Bon Jovi pumping from the speakers!. Her courage to embrace this sport has sparked creativity in myself and many others who love watching her ride.

Owning the boat as just a possession would be short-sighted. Seeing it as a tool that unlocks creativity which then inspires others to try new things, has been truly enriching.

Engaging in creative activities, especially when shared with others, allows us to reconnect with a sense of purpose and play. Play is an essential part of our humanity, however it’s easy to lose as we grow older and get caught up in the hustle of work and responsibility. Yet, it’s precisely what brings out our creativity which leads to more richness in life.

Charity: Using Resources for Good

One of the most fulfilling aspects of owning a boat has been the opportunity to practice charity in a nontraditional sense. The boat became more than a toy—it became a way to share joy and create experiences for others.

We’ve invited friends who would otherwise never have the chance to experience the water this way, offering them an opportunity to try something new. Hosting others on the boat has become an act of charity—not in the form of giving money, but by sharing time, experiences, and a piece of our lives with those around us.

True charity is about how we use our resources—time, money, influence, possessions—to become a “force for good” in others’ lives. Whether it’s through hosting a family that could use a day of fun or simply offering a space for meaningful conversations on the water, the boat has allowed a way to give back.

Challenges: Pursuing Growth and Personal Mastery

Lastly, the Nautique has challenged me in unexpected ways. Learning to operate and navigate the water craft was part of the initial journey, however my new challenge is in mastering wakefoiling. This form of surfing has a steep learning curve and it has pushed me both physically and mentally. 

It has taken 3 years to become competent but now wakefoiling has become my favorite activity behind the boat. When listening to the right music, I liken it to riding in deep snow—smooth and flowy. With The Cure playing in the background, I get into a meditative trance – a form of aerial synchronized riding!

On the water, every day brings new challenges—whether it’s learning a new skill or managing the boat in changing weather conditions. These experiences have reinforced that I feel most fulfilled in my life when I am  actively challenging myself to grow.

Living the 4 C’s

Life’s true rewards don’t come from owning more possessions; rather I have found they come when we live within the 4 C’s.

If I asked you to recall your top three life memories, what would they be? For most, the answers usually involve meeting their life partner, the birth of their children, starting a new opportunity, or completing a difficult challenge. Isn’t it curious that the list seldom includes a significant purchase, a bank balance, or a work title?

Yet, where do we invest the majority of our time?

When considering how to invest our time—the one truly rare and precious non-renewable asset we have—it shouldn’t be measured by ROI (Return on Investment). Instead, it should be considered based on ROE (Return on Experiences). The best experiences are those we share with the people we love and care about.

The ultimate expression of our humanity is love. I believe that, at the end of our lives, we will reflect on those closest to us and how we gave and received love.

For me, the 4 C’s—Connections, Creativity, Charity, and Challenges—have become the real foundations for creating a meaningful life filled with love. It makes sense, as we will feel most fulfilled when we are both growing and giving.

The Nautique can be viewed as just a possession—a temporary thing. However, in the right context, it has become a conduit for enriching my life and the lives of others. It has taught me that the most valuable things in life aren’t things at all—they are the moments, relationships, and experiences created when you use possessions to foster meaningful connections with others.

As you reflect on your life, ask yourself: Are you focused on the 4 C’s? Are you investing your time and resources in relationships, creativity, giving back, and personal growth? Or are you investing in the 4 P’s, stuck on the hedonic treadmill, chasing things that will never bring lasting fulfillment?